Headed to the slammer?
So hey you thought me and Miss Moneypenny were going to hide under a rock until the next election? Guess again peeps! Turns out there is more than one thing to do with an algorithm (who knew). Also that court case between the Porcupeeeen and that weird mole is a #TrendingTopic and to stay revelent we gotta jump on those like Lisa with a spindle. It is all the rage what with Catherine Mickinin (sp.?) and Clarence Darrow and other old bags stopping in. All yacking in front of the very handsome Figgy and the other two! Woo!
So me and Miss Moneypenny fired up the thingamabob and we are ready to make a calculation. Annnnd holy cow!, it looks like they're gonna "throw the book" at the Porcupeeeen. Unless they don't. No seriously, after inputting inputting until our fingers got sore, our exslucive proprietary formula sez that the Peen has a 77.6% chance of beating the rap. That is better than three quarters if you don't have a calculator or if you flunked math (I passed -- whew!) The other twenty per cent or what not is probably Basil who can be a real crab. Still it is hard to imagine anybody voting for that weird mole who hangs out with nuns. I mean that guy is just too weird amirite?
Of course all can turn on a dime (wtf does that even means) if the Porcupeeeen takes the stand like we all wanna see. Who knows if it will turn up in black face or sing a song about a roast beef sandwich or perjer itself just for kix. Srsly it does crazy ass stuff like that and that is why the Porcupeeeen is a binanza for those of us in the news biz!!! Unpredictability -- it is priceless. That's what gets those topics trending, kids. Expect the unexpected and all that. Even if the Peen does not testlify other wacky stuff will happen like remember when Don Quijote kept the Code of Silence to protect the aninimity (sp?) of Don Quijote's number one drug dealer (poss. Porcupeeeen?) And ended up in the pokey but at least with no legs broke. Now that is drama. Keep clicking refresh, that is what matters!!!! Gotta be the first to know.
Anyway I will be in the courtroom but I promise I will be good. Relax peepers. Ya can't miss me: I will be the pink bear who looks like Melinda (Lindy). The only "objection" me and Miss Moneypenny have is if you do not check check check this page for more. As you can see we have rilly brushed up on our legal jargin and we are ready to make a motion for this and a motion for that till we hail a cab or something. So watch out and don't get your tail stuck under the gavel, rite SCOUNDREL?
FIRST
ReplyDeleteFIRST
ReplyDeleteFIRTST
ReplyDeletehey did i dubl post??
ReplyDeleteWORST
ReplyDeleteWURST
ReplyDeleteWORSE
ReplyDeleteup yours
ReplyDeleteThis seems dumb even for Lindy. It is one thing to use statistical modeling to try to guess the outcome of an election. But you can't use it to predict Supreme Court decisions. That's not crowd behavior. The Court is three individuals and they can rule any which way they want. They're not enslaved to the numbers.
ReplyDeleteActually, Pork Chop, that isn't true. It's entirely possible to generate a database of prior opinions and predict Court outcomes with startling accuracy. If we can ascertain a justice's legal proclivities, we can, generally speaking, project future decisions from those. For instance, we know that Figgy likes peppermint sticks and has consistently ruled in favor of them (for dessert). Thus we can safely assume that Figgy will rule in favor of any peppermint sticks that come before the court.
ReplyDeleteWhere Lindy goes off the rails, I think, is in her percentages. As I see it, there is virtually no chance that the Supreme Court will decide in favor of Holy Moley. The Porcupeeeen's freedom of expression is likely to be guarded by a Court that has been consistently ferocious in defense of civil liberties. I believe Fellow designed the Court along these lines. We would do well to remember that the Court opted not to strike down Porcupeeeen's song "Faggots Eating Fried Chicken", which was also quite problematic. The new song is, if anything, more ambiguous. I must conclude that Lindy has inflated the percentage in order to heighten interest in the case and drive readership to this weblog. That's regrettable, but I suppose it is the media environment in which we dwell.
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeleteStop censoring my comments! I SAID Porcupeen ROX specifically because the Peen does not go in for all of that "politically correct" b.s. The Porcupeeeen tells it like it is and that's why the records SELL. The nuns are getting too big for their britches and deep down you all know they need to be rammed into the lint screen. Porcupeeeen was the only one with the guts to say so.
ReplyDeleteAs you all know I am a Judge and a member of the legal community and privy to inside info. The scuttle butt in the cloak room tells me that Olive may make a surprise decision. Word is that Olive is v. concerned about the erosion of civility in the Meadow. Also segregation. Olive in this case might favor a more Activist court.
ReplyDeleteSupreme Courts twist and turn all the time and only Fools try to pigeon hole we Judges.
thank you for your insight, judge mental.
ReplyDeletealso monty, i think you are misinterpreting the song.
then again, who knows for sure?
And that right there is the beauty of Porcupeeeeen!!!!
ReplyDeletelike many others I am greivously concerned about the civil unrest and divisive hate speech in the box. a song like mother superior in the lint screen fans the flames of division between Catholics and non-Catholics in the box and should be band. I hope the Supreme Court will come to its senses and bring us the Star Wars Missile Defense System that the Oyster promised and then broke that promise out of cowardice. If we had a Star Wars Missile Defense System we could drop a bomb on Porcupeeeen when it begins to hate speech. This solves all our problems. In conclusion it is still something we need and I hope the Supreme Court makes the right decision.
ReplyDeleteso are the lucky cat and the sex princess officially an item? hot if so!
ReplyDeleteWouldn't you like to know?
ReplyDeleteIt's "Mother Superior is a Lint Trap"!
ReplyDeleteI hate it when people don't know the words to pop songs!
Melinda, I see you have made no attempt to clean up your spelling or your grammar.
ReplyDeleteYour slovenly approach to journalism insults the intelligence of all of us in Playt Estates.
Given your carelessness, and your refusal to learn from past mistakes, I am forced to conclude that your analysis is worthless.
Sincerely,
Walker Owl
yet you continue to read. and comment!
ReplyDeleteface it, walker, you're hooked. just like the rest of us.
sabermetric owl thank you for mentioning that song hurtful though it is
ReplyDeleteit is very triggering for me to see it written but i must face it
you may not know but i am gay
i testified today b/c we need to create safe space for those who have been othered/others in the box
it is hard to breathe when there is language of oppression
***Are we?***
ReplyDeleteThe problem is that this blog is the only game in town. If Lindy hadn't scared away the other blogs with her popularity I bet we'd read those instead. Remember when SCOUNDREL used to do Playt News Weekly? That was hard to read on account of all the extra Ps and Ts but it was always 100% accurate. I wish that would come back.
ReplyDeleteAlso China said he was about to drop some big news. We're all waiting.
That said, I do like Yellow Journalism, because I am partial to Yellow things.
I don't exactly know what to say, chica. I... thought we really clicked. Not just sexually. But then you went and got busy with a bunch of other people, and objects, and... I know that's your thing, and I don't want you to change for my sake. But I don't really roll like that. I'm a bit more proprietary than I think you'd ever be comfortable with. Well -- more than a bit. So... yeah. That's where I'm at. It was fun, believe me.
ReplyDeleteThis is an inappropriate conversation for a public forum.
ReplyDeleteFlagged.
you are right
ReplyDeletei struggle daily with the guilt
and ask myself am i complicit in sexual assault
did i look the other way
what could i have done to stop it
Well, that's a first.
ReplyDelete??!?!?!?!??!??!??!!!!!!?!?!
ReplyDeleteLittle Pink Star, we've been over this -- many times.
ReplyDeleteI don't demand ideological purity from my friends and teammates, but I do expect them to be able to spot a smear campaign. In this case, it isn't even a well-orchestrated one. Not only are there no spindles in the game of Altiplano -- it's wool, for heaven's sake -- but it's not even an actual dowel. It's a *representation* of wool on a flat, circular piece of cardboard. The idiots spreading these rumors can't even get the weapon right.
Beyond that, Little Pink Star, I'm surprised and disappointed that you, of all little stars, would believe any of this nonsense about me. I've always had your back during hard times. Don't you remember when you were doubting yourself? I put you in charge of the Jugger Nut to prove to you that you had the makings of a champion. Doesn't it hurt to watch these games from the sidelines? We ought to be competing for another championship right now. Come to your senses so we can get the team back together.
give it up lisa. we know you touched those kids.
ReplyDeleteLisa would never!!!!
ReplyDeletethat is why this is so hard for me
ReplyDeletebut we have to believe the accuser
i believe in second chances lisa but only after you get the help you need
stop victim shaming
LISA you are headed to JALE
ReplyDeleteDon Quijote rot in JALE with the other drugies
Little Pink Star welcome to JALE
SCOUNDREL go directly to JALE
Porcupeeeeen enjoy JALE
Holey Moley go straight to JALE
Sex Princess go to JALE
LOCK THEM UPPP
What accuser? There is no accuser!
ReplyDeleteCome ON.
No JALE can hold the Porcupeeeeeeen!
ReplyDeleteNo jail can, either.
These are troubled times. These days I don't know what to believe. We are all so worried about Little Bird. Peen obscenity fills the air waves. SCOUNDREL said that Harvey Weinstein is a personal hero. Lisa is a spindle raper and has hid the bodies of the victims in the woods. Also there is Weiner. Plus we ran out of those raspberry cookies with the white chocolate in them. When will it stop? Taylor Swift help us.
ReplyDelete***I have thought it over****
ReplyDelete***I think I am ready for a committed relationship. At least to try????***
***I don't blame you if you don't believe me. But I think you are amazing and I kind of love you****
***I am up for trying!!!!****
We are with you Little Pink Star in your stand. The power privileged are trying to shame you and silence you! Speak your truth. Accusers need to be believed. Because we know that almost all these rape alligations turn out to be true. It was true about SCOUNDREL and Orvil Redenbacher too.
ReplyDeleteIf you read Lisa's pa-thet-ic statement anyone can see that Lisa uses the language of the oppressor and emotional manipulation. Lisa exploits her position as the manager of the Jugger Nut to keep her players in line. Well, it is a new day Lisa, and your power privilege will not stand because we are speaking out!
Hm. I wonder if White Girl will need to Rein In some of the Fringe Elements of her Party.
DeleteLISA INNOCENT
ReplyDelete...and with friends like those...
ReplyDeletemuffy you have good moxie. this means you have a bright future in the movement. there are a few things you need to brush up on first though. for instance you need to use more hash tags. when you get to the end of what you have to say you go hash tag and then you add something snappy like not all women or all women or whatever number of women there happen to be. also you said keep her players in line. instead you have to say silenced. i realize you said silenced in the earlier paragraph but that is no excuse. this is not how you will get ahead in the movement. also a big tip is to hold up a cardboard sign with a powerful messaging on it in black sharpie and then take a picture. also you can post this picture to the internet if you add hash tags. you will be fine if you do these things. but you need hash tags.
ReplyDelete#noturtlesplaining
ReplyDeleteOUTPUT: good idea
ReplyDeleteAttn. Lisa -- form a team with me instead. Pulverize the league with me!
CONT.: divorce Cloten.
Dump the Zeroes and get with the hero.
END TRANSMISSION
Okay, chica. Let's give it a go.
DeleteAwwww....
ReplyDeleteAwwwwwwww.....
ReplyDeleteawwwwwww....!!
ReplyDeleteBOINGG
ReplyDeleteWill you ever stop embarrassing me????
ReplyDeleteEXTRA EXTRA!!! Big news!
ReplyDeleteThe China Report has learned that the Special Council is investigating links between the Oyster's Campaign and the Russians. In fact the Crime Dog is currently in the Scythe box questioning all red pieces!
The Crime Dog would not answer direct questions, stating only that this is an ongoing investigation into what could be *major improprieties* within the Oyster's Campaign.
Hold on to your hats -- this plot is likely to thicken!
Whoah!!!
DeleteI knew it!
ReplyDeletean shadup china too. you ain no nues braker no mor. you ar atta dait like jony carsin.
ReplyDeletelet em envestagate all day. dey ain gona find nuthin. i don no any rushins. i won reelekshun fare an squair by a zillion. i am comish and i ain goin nowair.
I will not shut up. I know something was fishy about that election and it's all going to come out.
ReplyDeleteI won't be silenced.
You sound like Muffy.
ReplyDeleteHere we go again with the same old garbage. We all saw the results for the election. Numbers don't lie and Da Oysta had more of them. You can add it up and slice it however you want but a zillion is a zillion. Deal with the fact that nobody wanted a drug addict photograph of a little girl to be commish. What a shocker.
ReplyDeleteThompson -- you drink and drink the Haterade but you just get more thirsty. Maybe the problem is you. As for China, nobody reads that anymore. China, you are just mad that Lindy keeps scooping you so you are manufacturing a nothing story in an attempt to get a meager few clicks. Smells like desperation. P.U.
As for the Special Council, they just got trounced in their play-in game. Now they have nothing better to do so they're looking under every rock for a reason to exist. It's just sad.
I am an Oyster supporter, but I won't have China talked about like that. China is a serious reporter. Lindy is a sensationalist.
ReplyDeleteI suspect it's more than that.
ReplyDeleteI think it's suspicious that Lindy hasn't blogged in months and months and now suddenly she's blogging like no time has gone by.
I think she's trying to distract us because she knows something big is coming out.
I am innocent too!
ReplyDeleteEarth to Thompson. Lindy is blogging now because there's a big court case going on and that's what people want to read about. Why bother people when there's nothing happening?
ReplyDeleteFurthermore, all you people complaining about Lindy's grammar and picking over her sentences need to get a life. Who died and made you English teacher? What you fail to understand is that Lindy gives us the news the way *we* want to read it. That's why she's cleaning up in the ratings. Thomson and Walker are the kind of people who would rather read farm reports than a good story. The news has changed and we are not putting up with dullsville anymore. Lindy understands that.
Bear - owl rumble!!!!
ReplyDeleteScary Bear, you are being unfair to Special Council. They were in a tough spot there. They had to try to take the factory on the last turn. For whatever reason the other two sides weren't going to fight. They were running out the clock. It was really gutsy of Crime Dog to gamble on that play, even when Crimea had the special feature of stealing a Power Card. Someone had to try. They tried and it didn't work and they finished last and made the tournament. But in a way they had a better game than the ones who were being kinda chicken in my opinion.
ReplyDeleteAnyway it was a great game.
Finished last and missed the tournament, I mean.
ReplyDeleteGeno, don't you ever think about anything besides the game?
ReplyDeleteHeck no, buddy! Me and Virginia Bluebell have a tournament to win! See you out there!
ReplyDeleteGeno, you're the coolest.
ReplyDeleteno tine for playt news weeklyt, unfortunatelyt. need to care for CHEESE. soon will have more tine, hopefullyt. keep fingerp cross.
ReplyDeleteSCOUNDREL
I like farm reports.
ReplyDelete